by Cyanlot
Dr. Kim helps Rick and Gary solve their problems.
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"Take your clothes off."
Dr. Kim's blunt command startled me and I hesitated. "Do you want this situation fixed? Do you want Gary to treat you better?"
I nodded, still stunned by what Dr. Kim had asked me to do. She had always seemed so professional and proper. Outside the office, I would have pegged her for a stereotypical demure Asian woman. But, there she was calling on me to strip naked in front of her.
"Well, Rick," she continued, "if you want that, and you trust me, you need to do as I say. I'm not shooting in the dark here. I know what will work. I was pretty sure even before I met with Gary. But, after we met, I was positive. All that remains now is for you to do as I say."
I did trust Dr. Kim. She had a great reputation as a therapist who could work wonders when people were having sex-related problems. And, apparently, she was not just a good therapist; she was a good salesperson. When I raised the idea with Gary of him talking with Dr. Kim, he dismissed it out of hand. It wasn't even a topic for discussion. I tried the "I can't keep doing this" strategy but Gary tossed it off. He said he was pretty confident that I'd keep taking care of him. It was said with an ambiguous tone. I couldn't tell if he was threatening me with blackmail or just predicting that I wouldn't want to cut things off any more than he would.
When I told Dr. Kim that I didn't think I could get Gary to see her, she asked for his phone number. That same afternoon, she texted me that she'd set up a meeting with Gary for the next day. And now, here we were, just two weeks after my last session with Dr. Kim and she was telling me she had the solution to my problems with Gary at hand. Apparently, the solution involved me stripping naked in front of her. I wasn't comfortable with this, but I was willing to try whatever Dr. Kim thought would work.
Getting started taking my clothes off was the hardest part. Once I got started, it seemed sort of automatic. At least until I got to down to my boxers. It's incredibly embarrassing, I learned at that moment, to strip completely naked, in the full light of an office, in front of a woman—a beautiful woman, actually—while she sits watching, calmly and clinically.
I wanted to cover myself with my hands, but that seemed as if it would feel even more humiliating. I stood there, feeling incredibly awkward for what felt like an eternity, though it was probably less than a minute. I felt my cock rising, more from the intense embarrassment than from sexual arousal, I think, though in my present vulnerable position, I couldn't help but think of what Dr. Kim would look like naked and what might happen if she were. So, maybe it was a combination of sexual arousal and embarrassment.
"Come here," Dr. Kim said, getting up and walking toward a door on the side of her office. This wasn't the door that clients came in through and I'd assumed that it was just another access to a hallway. I was wrong. It turned out to be a bathroom—a full bathroom, complete with a shower.
"Stand there." I was in passive obedience mode so I did as Dr. Kim ordered. She opened a jar of some sort of cream and began spreading it all over my body. It stunk, kind of like ammonia, and it burned by skin some—not terribly, but enough to be uncomfortable. Neither the smell nor the stinging prevented my body from responding to her touch. She was doing this in a professional, clinical way but by the time she'd covered practically all of my body with the cream, my cock was completely erect. She seemed utterly indifferent to my response. "Just wait there," Dr. Kim said. "This will take about ten minutes.
The depilatory cream burned, but still my body felt cold and I shivered a little while I stood there, waiting for it to do its work. Dr. Kim left me for a while, doing something in the office. I couldn't tell what.
She came back in with a towel that she used to wipe the depilatory cream off my body and, with it, all of my body hair.
"Get in the shower and wash well to get rid of that awful smell," Dr. Kim instructed. I was eager to do that, more to get rid of the sting, which was still irritating me, than the smell.
Running the soap over my body was a novel experience. I was surprised by how different it felt to touch my body now when it was completely denuded of hair. When I stepped out of the shower, I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror. My body looked so strange to me. It's not that I was such a hairy guy to start with, but the absence of what hair I did have made a remarkable difference in how I looked, as much as it did in how it felt to touch my body as I dried off.
As I was finishing drying off, Dr. Kim returned. I suppose I shouldn't have been surprised by what she was carrying. But I really hadn't thought this all through, so I was. She had a handful of women's clothing—everything from panties and a bra to stockings and high heels. And she had a blonde wig. I might have been dense in not anticipating this once she used the depilatory cream on me, but now I saw where this was all going.
"I don't see how this is going to help," I said, as if my opinion was relevant.
It might have sounded like a protest, and I guess I intended it that way, but Dr. Kim just said: "Don't worry. It is ... as you'll see soon enough."
Dr. Kim began dressing me. First the lavender garter belt, bra, and panties. I'm afraid this got me rather excited. My cock was rigid and sticking obscenely out of my lacy panties. Dr. Kim noticed my look of embarrassment and said, in her calming, clinical voice, "Don't worry. We'll take care of that later. It won't be a problem." I wasn't quite sure what the potential problem was, except that I was embarrassed, and that was already a problem.
I told myself that my arousal was caused by Dr. Kim's touch. She's a very pretty woman and, of course, I'd had some fantasies about her. Here she was, now, touching my smooth body in intimate places. Of course I was going to get hard.
I'm sure that Dr. Kim's touch was part of the reason I was getting hard. But, trying to be honest with myself, I had to admit that the feel of the silky bra and panties would probably have been enough to provoke my raging hardon.
And it only got worse as Dr. Kim eased the sheer white stockings up to my thighs and fastened them to the garter belt. I found myself squirming slightly, which increased the stimulation as my cock rubbed against my panties and garter belt.
"Sit down." Dr. Kim gestured toward the commode. "And quit squirming. I'll never be able to do the makeup if you're fidgeting like that."
Before she got to work with the makeup, though, Dr. Kim fastened my high heels and then slipped two breast forms in the cups of my bra. The color matched my skin close enough that, on a quick glance, they looked passable. They weren't large, but they filled the cups nicely and gave me a very feminine shape.
Mostly, I had to hold very still while Dr. Kim worked on my makeup, but when she turned to get some different implement of feminization, I took the opportunity to steal a glance of myself. Looking down at my chest and legs, there was really nothing that suggested that I was a man, except for my still hard cock thrusting out of the top of my panties.
Dr. Kim finished up by putting on my wig and some jewelry. Then she went back into her office, affording me an opportunity to look myself over closely for the first time.
The transformation was remarkable! I'm slender enough that, between the way the breast forms changed my shape and the panties and garter belt fooled the eye, I looked every bit the part of a slender, attractive woman. And Dr. Kim had done wonders on my face. She was able to soften my brow, enlarge my eyes, highlight my cheek bones, make my lips look fuller and my chin shorter, all with the use of things as simple as eye shadow, lipstick, and various tinted rouges and powders. If she ever wanted to give up sex therapy, she could have a fabulous career as a makeup artist.
Before I was done admiring myself, Dr. Kim came back holding a light, gauzy dress. It was very simple—a wrap-around style, that had a delicate tie in front. It was a pastel floral print that coordinated well with the lavender of my underwear.
"Before we put this one, dear," Dr. Kim said, hanging the dress on the back of the bathroom door, "let's take care of that problem." She turned my back to the washstand and leaned me against it. And then she stunned me completely.
She sank to her knees and pulled my panties down enough to completely free my straining cock. Without a word, she took it in both hands and brought her mouth—her sweet, delicate mouth—to my aching member. And then her lips were around me, encircling the head of my cock and she began moving her lips on and off my shaft.
As she pulled off, I could see clearly lips, bright red with lipstick, being pulled out. Sometimes the head of my cock would come completely out and I'd watch her lips stretch to accommodate the pronounced cap of my cock. As she moved back on to my cock, her lips would disappear, coating my shaft with her lipstick, as I could see when she, once again, pulled away from me.
With one hand, she cupped my balls and with the other she pumped the base of my cock. Sometimes she would pull off completely and lick the underside of my cock, lingering on the most sensitive spot just under the helmet. Mostly, though, she was energetically working my cock with her hands and lips.
Maybe there's no such thing as a bad blow job. I've never had one anyway. But that doesn't mean that all blowjobs are equal. Dr. Kim was not only blowing my cock; she was blowing my mind. I felt an intensity of sexual passion that I couldn't remember ever experiencing before.
I would have liked for it to last forever, or at least for longer than it did. But Dr. Kim wasn't into teasing. She was a woman on a mission and her mission wasn't to string me along; it was to get me off.
And get me off she did. I exploded in her mouth and roared in a way that was completely inconsistent with my demure feminine attire.
God it felt good! I pumped and pumped my cum into Dr. Kim's mouth, putting my hands on the back of her head to control her movements.
And then my muscles went limp, like a ragdoll. I collapsed back against the vanity, putting almost my full weight on it since my legs clearly couldn't support me now. Through half-closed, stupefied eyes, I saw Dr. Kim get up matter-of-factly, reach for a hand towel, and wipe her face.
"There, that took care of that problem," she said, tucking my soft and hyper-sensitive cock back into my panties and straightening me up there. "You can rest for just a minute. It's almost time to get started with the session."
The session! Jesus, what was she talking about? I'd just had the most intense "session" of my life. What was on tap now?
Dr. Kim left the room again and I didn't really think much about what might be next on our agenda. I was floating in that dreamy space that is created after a crashing orgasm.
The peace was broken when Dr. Kim returned and told me it was time to get my dress on. She helped me into it, which was good because I was still a little shaky, then led me back into the office.
I was wobbly on the high heels and I was looking down to be careful not to trip, so at first I didn't see Gary in the room. When I heard him make some sound—I think it was the sound or rapid inhaling people sometimes make when they're surprised—I returned his startled look. Dr. Kim had said nothing about Gary coming to the session tonight.
"Gary, I want you to meet Erica." There was no one else in the room but, still, it took me a second to realize that Dr. Kim was christening me with a feminine name.
"I know that you and Rick have been having some problems recently. Erica is very close to Rick and I want you two to work things out. If you and Erica," Dr. Kim said looking now at Gary, "can work things out, it will solve the problems you're having with Rick."
So now I understood Dr. Kim's plans. Gary and I were supposed to establish a relationship with me *en femme*. I didn't know how that was supposed to solve anything but I had to give the good doctor points for creativity.
"First, Gary," Dr. Kim began, "do you think that Erica is attractive? Do you think she's sexy?"
Gary didn't say anything but he nodded. More than his gesture, the look in his eyes answered Dr. Kim's question and I felt myself blush with embarrassment and, I think, pride.
I didn't have any script for tonight's activities so I was happy when Dr. Kim began giving directions. She had Gary stand up and then said, "Erica, why don't you start things off?" I didn't know what that meant so she gave me a broad hint. "They say that the road to a man's heart is through is stomach, but psychologists know that it's a different organ, a bit lower in the male anatomy."
Well, that was obvious enough. Gary was standing a few feet from me. I managed to get down on my knees without looking to awkward and instantly felt relief. I wasn't trying to balance on those damn high heels—something that would have been hard enough for me to do at any time but was really challenging when my legs were still wobbly from the crashing orgasm I'd just had.
Now I was in familiar territory, even if not in familiar attire. I reached up and unzipped Gary's pants. It was hard to get him out the fly—he was already stiffening—so I unfastened his buckle and unbuttoned his pants so that I could push them down to his thighs.
I was now faced with the familiar sight of Gary's hard cock, waiting to be taken into my mouth. But I felt oddly different in a way I couldn't really put into words. In the past, when I'd sucked Gary off, I'd always been excited—at first, really scared, too, but always excited. Something was different though.
I felt a tingling all through my body. Maybe it was as simple as the fact that my body was especially sensitive from being stripped of hair. Maybe it was some sort of after effect of the incredible orgasm Dr. Kim had given me. But it seemed to me that there was something else at play here. I think being dressed as a woman—and feeling like a very attractive one at that—made me feel freer to really embrace what I was doing.
Before, despite the excitement I'd always felt when I gave Gary a blow job, there was always some part of me that was standing back, reminding me that I was a guy. I was giving him a blow job like a guy would give a guy a blow job.
Now, I felt like a woman. I was completely into what I was doing. I yearned for Gary's cock; I wanted to make love to it. I wanted to feel my delicate hands around it and my moist lips encircling it to send waves of pleasure through his gorgeous body.
That's how I thought of it. Of course, though my lips might have been a bit moister because of the lipstick Dr. Kim had coated them with, my hands weren't any more delicate than they'd ever been. Still, that's how I thought of them now. And, while I'd always thought that Gary was an attractive man, I'd never consciously framed this in terms of his having a gorgeous body.
As I brought my lips, quivering with anticipation, to Gary's hard cock, I made a vow to myself that I wouldn't pull back from this feeling. I wouldn't let fear or timidity taint what I was feeling. I was going to be completely in the moment.
I attacked Gary's cock eagerly, moaning audibly as the pleasure of his hard cock filling my mouth overwhelmed me. A feeling of intense satisfaction swept over my body. I realized that I was exploring some part of my psyche that had been denied all my life.
Gary's response fed my enthusiasm in a virtuous circle, an upward spiral of sexual excitement for both of us. I'd never felt stronger a sexual desire—a deeper erotic yearning—than I experienced at that moment. I wanted Gary in every way possible—at once, if that were possible.
But Dr. Kim had other plans. She stopped us and told me to stand up. This was not easy for me—not the standing part. The difficulty started before I tried to climb back up on those high heels. The difficult was pulling away from Gary's lovely hard cock.
As I reluctantly backed away, I looked at the slick, shiny shaft longingly. I didn't want to let out of my mouth but ... you know: doctor's orders. If I had to let it out of my mouth, I certainly didn't want to let it out of my sight. I made my way up to a standing position, still looking as what I know thought of as the most beautiful thing in the world.
"Erica, untie your dress and let Gary see your beautiful body."
I fumbled a little with the tie and, as I began to move to pull the dress apart, exposing my body to Gary, I suddenly felt very vulnerable. What if, seeing my body more fully, his eyes showed that he'd lost some of his enthusiasm? What if after seeing me an answer to Dr. Kim's question about whether I was attractive, whether I was sexy, would get a polite nod, but not the look in Gary's eyes that really answered the question.
So, my hands were trembling slightly as I opened my dress to expose my body to Gary. I watched his eyes with trepidation. When I'd exposed myself to him in only my sheer, silky undergarments, I saw my answer. Gary's pupils swelled and I saw him swallow. He wanted me. "Thank God!" I thought, "thank God!"
I let my dress fall off my shoulders onto the floor.
"You should pick that up," said Dr. Kim. For just a second, I thought she'd had an inappropriate moment of fastidiousness. Then I realized that she didn't care at all about the dress.
I turned by back to Gary and bent over at the waist, keeping my legs straight, to pick up the dress. It was, I was sure, a provocative pose—though if I'm any judge of Gary, or men in general, further provocation was hardly necessary.
Dr. Kim was standing in front of her desk, very near us. She gently guided me back toward Gary until he and I were face-to-face, just a few inches apart. Gary's about three inches taller than I am, but with my heels we were exactly eye-to-eye. And we were exactly lip-to-lip.
Now I was terrified! Dr. Kim had orchestrated a moment when, between any man and woman (and maybe between gay couples for all I knew), there would be a passionate kiss. Where the two people would, as kids say, "suck face."
Kissing had never been any part of Gary's and my relationship. I was afraid that the invitation being presented would freak Gary out and queer the deal (if you'll pardon the expression). Frankly, it sort of weirded me out. I didn't know what to think about it.
My thoughts didn't drive the moment, though. Before I knew it, Gary's lips were on mine. For just a second, I was startled by the intensity of his kiss. I didn't resist—I was too startled even for that—but I didn't yield, either. That second passed and, with it, any thoughts of resistance, and any feelings of weirdness.
My mouth opened to Gary's tongue and he probed my mouth eagerly. I had one arm around his back, but my other hand found its way down to Gary's hard cock, still slick with my saliva. Gary had one hand on the back of my head, pulling me with urgency to his mouth. His other hand was on my ass, first outside my panties and then, quickly, inside, kneading my ass.
We kissed for only a few moments. Dr. Kim told me to get down on my knees again to get Gary ready to fuck me. Hardness and hotness of his cock in my hand made it clear that he was already ready to fuck me, but I was more than happy to take him back in my mouth again.
As I got down, Dr. Kim suggested that I take off my panties. I did that while ministering, lovingly, to Gary's cock. And then, still sucking his cock deeply into my mouth, I helped pull down his pants the rest of the way and get them off his legs completely. I could feel that Gary was pulling off his shirt at the same time. We were both in a frenzy to get unnecessary clothes off and get on with it.
Dr. Kim told me to turn away from Gary and get on my hands and knees. I guessed at the time that she was orchestrating things in such a way that Gary could cling to the image of me as a ... what had he agreed to ... attractive, sexy woman. Doggy-style fucking would keep my unlady-like parts out of view.
I was on my hands and knees, presenting myself like a bitch in heat, ready to be mounted. Gary didn't waste any time. In only the amount of time necessary to put on a condom (which, no doubt, Dr. Kim had thoughtfully provided), I felt Gary gently pulling my ass cheeks apart and lining up his cock with my ravenous asshole.
God, I wanted him! All the more so because I could feel how much he wanted me. When he'd lined up and pressed just the tip of his cock part way in, I felt both of his hands on my hips, holding them tightly through my garter belt, so that he could control his entry.
He pushed in gently, but forcefully. I was so eager to feel him fill my cunt (as I thought of it) that I would have forgiven any pain he caused me by moving too quickly. But it was nice that he was trying to be considerate.
Soon, he was all the way in and I felt a sense of satisfaction sweep over me. I felt aglow and again I moaned audibly with pleasure.
Gary began to fuck me. I could tell that he had to resist the urge to thrust wildly right from the beginning. But I think, like me, he wanted this to last for a while. As he fucked me so wonderfully, I felt my own cock harden till it was slapping against my stomach. This surprised me. I was never a quick repeater, certainly not since my teenage years. But, tonight was exceptional in many ways, I realized.
And then something happened that I couldn't understand at first. Dr. Kim was standing right next to us, her legs touching my side. I could feel Gary twisting to the side and for a few moments, horribly, his rhythm was interrupted. I tried to twist around enough to see what was happening, but to no avail. Gary was holding my hips too tightly.
Fortunately, he settled back into a good fucking pace and I sort of forgot about what might be going on behind by back (or above it, really). As long as it didn't interfere with Gary's and my fucking, I decided it was okay with me no matter what it was.
It's really hard to gauge time when you're fucking, I think, and I certainly wasn't watching the clock. I'd guess, though, that Gary fucked me for a good ten minutes before he started building up to his orgasm. Well, not really a *good* ten minutes. A *great, fantastic, marvelous* ten minutes. I tried slightly different postures—sometimes with my head down, sometimes with my back arched more or less—to change the angle of attack. I didn't find any angles that were bad and I found a lot that were terrific.
When it was obvious that Gary was about to cum, I was pushing back on to him like a fanatic—well, exactly like one, I guess—and clenching my asshole to intensify his orgasm. And just as Gary was starting to explode, I could feel Dr. Kim's legs stiffen next to me and I felt her leaning in even more toward us.
It was distracting. What was going on up there? Had she been forcing Gary's mouth on her clitoris while we'd been fucking? Was he bringing her to an orgasm with his mouth at exactly the same time he had his orgasm deep in my bowels? It turned out I was half right.
The distraction wasn't enough to keep me from enjoying the feeling of Gary erupting in my ass. He held my hips hard up against his crotch as he pumped out his cum.
I didn't cum from getting fucked in the ass the way you hear about sometimes in porn. Still, the whole thing was very satisfying to me. When Gary backed out of me and released my hips, I collapsed onto the carpet, a very contented girl.
As soon as I'd gathered my wits, I rolled over. I wasn't trying to see what had been going on between Gary and Dr. Kim. The rosy glow of my satisfaction kind of pushed that to the back of my mind. No, what I was trying to see was Gary's face. I felt as if I'd caused him great pleasure and I wanted to see the evidence of my success in his satisfied smile.
Instead, when I saw his face I was stunned. That's not a strong enough word but I don't know how to describe my state of mind. How do you describe the shock of your whole sense of reality being turned upside down?
Gary did look very satisfied. But what I couldn't wrap my mind around was the fact that just slipping out of his mouth was Dr. Kim's cock! That's right, *her cock*! And dripping from the side of Gary's mouth was some of Dr. Kim's cum.
I guess you can't say "her cock" and "her cum," can you? So I don't know how to talk about it. But what I saw was Dr. Kim, stripped down to her (okay, I'll say "her"—it's too hard to shift my perspective on a dime) bra and panties. Her bra was filled with natural breasts. No breast forms there. I'd seen the tops of those breasts as gentle swells when she'd worn low-cut tops. But sticking out of the side of her white panties was a softening, but still full, cock.
As her cock pulled away from Gary's lips, a string of semen continued to connect them until it finally broke and dribbled down onto my abdomen.
Gary had just had an enormous orgasm—the proof of which was in the stretched tip of the condom still wrapped around his own softening cock. But, mixed with the pleasure on his face, I saw discomfort. Gary, who I know had never had a cock in his mouth (we'd talked about that), had just sucked a big cock and had his mouth filled with cum.
I was having trouble wrapping my mind around this scene. Intellectually, it was easy enough. Dr. Kim was transsexual. I got that. And I'd seen videos of transsexuals—especially Asian ladyboys—who were absolutely convincing as women. I had all the background to realize that this could be possible but, still, it seemed completely impossible.
Apart from the shock of having to rethink my reality, I was increasingly concerned about how this was going to play out. Had Dr. Kim miscalculated? I suspected so. I worried that Gary would be disgusted by what he'd done and wouldn't want to have any part of me from now on because it would always remind him of the time he sucked cock.
As it turned out, my worries were misplaced.
After a rather long silence, during which each of us recovered a little and got dressed, Dr. Kim told us to sit down so we could talk about what had happened and where go from here. Gary and I sat on the couch, across the coffee table from Dr. Kim—Gary in his slacks and shirt and me in my dress. I realized as I sat there that the clothing affected the way I sat and moved and even the way I felt.
"So, you two," Dr. Kim began, "how did you feel about that?"
Gary and I started to speak at the same time, then we both paused to let the other speak, then we both started again. We laughed together, looking at each other as we did.
"Never mind. I know how you felt about it. I just wanted each of you to think about it." Dr. Kim paused to let us reflect on our feelings for a moment, then went on with her diagnosis and prescription.
"You see, the two of you had two relationships: one that was working fine for both of you and one that wasn't. And the dysfunctional one was bleeding over into the good one—threatening to destroy it." That sounded right to me and I hoped it did to Gary, too.
"You were both comfortable with your 'buddies with benefits' relationship. You both got different things from it, and I suspect that Gary didn't, and maybe still doesn't, understand what you got from it, Rick ... Erica. But it doesn't matter that a relationship isn't providing the same benefits for each person. A good, strong, equal relationship can exist when you're equally meeting each other's needs, even if those needs are very different."
"But when you tried to take your relationship to the next level, Gary wasn't comfortable with that. A buddy who sucked him off was okay with him—pretty great really. Right, Gary?" Gary nodded awkwardly. He seemed uncomfortable with where this might be going. Maybe he saw a criticism coming. If so, he was wrong. Dr. Kim wasn't trying to judge, just to understand and explain things to us.
"You see, Gary has a very strong self-image as a strictly heterosexual man." It occurred to me that I should protest that I always thought of myself in the same way, but I realized how ridiculous that would seem coming from me now, especially given my attire.
"Getting sucked off by another guy didn't do any violence to that self-image. He was just an alpha dog—the dominant guy who gets his sexual needs taken care of by those lower on the pecking order." I didn't like the analysis much, but I didn't see how I could argue with it. It had the ring of truth as Dr. Kim said it and I wondered why I hadn't thought of it this way before.
"But fucking ... ah, fucking was a whole 'nother thing. It called for him to be more active, more the initiator and aggressor." I wasn't sure that Dr. Kim was nailing it here. Gary had seemed pretty active and aggressive when he'd come over for blow jobs. She sensed my skepticism and explained: "I don't mean that he wasn't calling the shots then. What I mean is that he was prodding ... requesting, demanding, whatever ... *you* to do something. With anal sex, it was different. At least, it felt different to Gary."
I could see Gary nodding slightly, as if he was just coming to recognize what he'd been feeling.
"But this role provoked feelings that challenged his self-image. Do you understand what cognitive dissonance is?" We both nodded. That was a piece of psychological jargon that had seeped out of professional circles.
"Well, Gary was feeling it big time, even if he didn't deal with it consciously. He was a heterosexual man ... heterosexual men don't desire to fuck other men's bodies ... but he wanted to fuck your body, Rick." Now I think Gary and I both blushed, and both from the now open acknowledgment of the same fact: Gary wanted to fuck me.
"The cognitive dissonance caused Gary to be cruel toward you—you who were the occasion for him to experience that dissonance. By being dismissive, indifferent, even a little cruel to you, he could distance himself from the feelings that threatened his self-conception and reassert his masculinity."
"So, tonight," Dr. Kim continued, "we removed the threat to Gary's self-image. He could see you as Erica, a very attractive, sexy woman. And, what happened?"
She paused and for a moment I thought she hadn't intended the question rhetorically. But then she went on. "I'll tell you what happened. Gary was suddenly free to make love to you as he wanted to without feeling as if his masculinity was compromised. And he did. And he loved it. You both loved it, didn't you?"
We didn't need to answer that question, but I needed to ask one.
"But, Dr. Kim," I began, not sure how to frame my question.
"Yes?" She wasn't going to give me any help it seemed.
"What was ... I mean, what were you ... I mean ..."
Finally, after I'd stammered for a bit, Dr. Kim came to my aid. "What was the point of what I was doing with Gary?"
"Yes. And ..." I was still kind of speechless.
"And what, Erica? Why do I have a penis?" Dr. Kim laughed. "I don't think I have to answer that for you. You just have to come to grips with the fact that I'm not exactly the person you assumed I was. The fact that neither of you suspected that I was anything but a natural woman was vital to my plan."
Well, she had my attention now. I looked over at Gary, who was clearly feeling uncomfortable now that we were beginning to talk about his first cock-sucking experience.
"In all the times you guys were just doing oral sex, Gary never reciprocated. From what I've told you already, it's obvious why. He couldn't have squared that with his heterosexual self-image. But, if you're going to have an intimate relationship ... if you're going to be making love to each other, as I know you both want to ... Gary's going to need to satisfy you sexually, too. It's not enough that all of your satisfaction comes from pleasing him. That's not the foundation of a strong relationship."
That seemed right to me but I hadn't ever let myself seriously consider the prospect of Gary reciprocating. It seemed impossible and, so, I couldn't let myself acknowledge how much I wanted it.
"What I needed to teach Gary is that oral sex with a woman, even if her genitalia are a bit larger than normal, isn't a threat to his masculinity. What better way to do it than to present him with opportunity to perform oral sex on someone he thought of as an attractive woman? And what better time to do it than exactly when he's engaged in the uniquely masculine act of fucking another 'woman'?"
There was a little irony there because, of course, the "woman" Gary was fucking wasn't a woman at all. But I thought I got it. The point was, apparently, that he could conceptualize what he was doing as fucking a woman.
"Gary was leery at first, though I'm not really sure whether it was reluctance or just astonishment about what I had in my panties." She paused and looked at Gary. "Maybe a little of both."
"But as things progressed, I could tell that Gary was dealing with it okay." Gary made a sound as if to begin to protest but Dr. Kim cut him off.
"Now Gary," she said peremptorily, "don't go there. Or should I say, don't go *back* there. You learned something tonight. Don't forget it."
Whatever Gary was planning to say never got said. He seemed to accept what the good doctor was serving. It struck me then that Dr. Kim might be especially well-qualified for her job. She understood both men and women extraordinarily well.
I was still a little foggy about where we were going from here. "So, where are we now?" I said tentatively. "Am I supposed to be a crossdresser from now on?"
"Where the two of you will go is up to you," Dr. Kim said, unhelpfully. Fortunately, that wasn't all she said. "Your relationship could develop in many different ways that are equally wonderful and exciting. That's for you to discover together. My job was go put you on a path where you could do that."
"But I do have a suggestion for how to start off on that path." Gary and I were all ears.
"First, don't try to move too quickly to change things. I told you that you had two relationships: Gary and Rick, and Gary and Erica. They can both be good now, I think. I'd suggest that for now, and for as long as it's good for both of you, you continue to have your "buddies with benefits" relationship. You don't have to lock it in; it can change over time. But it's worked for both of you and it's not hurting anyone so, I say, go for it."
"You should explore your Gary/Erica relationship. I think you'll both find it exciting and rewarding. But, Erica, when you do this—at least for now—you need to be Erica, not Rick. This will not only make Gary more comfortable but, as you learned tonight, it will make it more exciting for you."
"And Gary." Dr. Kim looked at him closely and paused for an uncomfortably long time. "Gary, you really need to take care of Erica, too. Bringing his lover to an orgasm with his mouth can be an extremely erotic experience for a guy, right? ... as you learned tonight."
I'm happy to say that Gary and I nurtured both of our relationships. We continued the "buddies with benefits" thing as before, but I was always Erica when we engaged in intimacy beyond oral sex. I explored the novel excitements that were available to me *en femme*. And Gary let himself relax to the point where he could enjoy our relationship without dealing with any internal demons. He treated me well and he did learn the erotic pleasures of giving your lover an orgasm, even if (maybe, especially when) her genitalia are larger than normal. I certainly learned the erotic pleasures of experiencing those orgasms.
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